Steve Phillips’ Public Walk of Shame

Steve Phillips had an affair with this dog over the summer.  Now shes telling the world.

Steve Phillips had an affair with this dog over the summer. Now she's telling the world.

To quote Macaulay Culkin’s character in the masterpiece Home Alone, “Buzz! Your girlfriend! Woof!”  And that may even be an understatement of epic proportions to refer to the mistress in the Steve Phillips affair saga.

For those of you unfamiliar with the situation, here’s the drama:  Steve Phillips had a relationship with a 22-year production assistant at ESPN this past summer.  Brooke Hundley, the mistress, apparently thought the relationship was much more serious than it turned out to be and wound up giving a letter detailing their sordid affair to Phillips’ wife.  Allegedly, Hundley sat in the driveway of Phillips’ family home in Wilton, CT and waited for the wife to get home to deliver the letter in person.  But when the wife came home, Hundley panicked, got in her car, and backed out of the driveway (not before backing through a stone wall), speeding away.  The letter was left on the front door. Furthermore, Hundley stalked Phillip’s eldest son, chatting with him under a fake name on instant messager, friending him with a fake profile on Facebook, and trying to glean family information from the boy.

I wouldn't bang this heffer with CareBear's dick.

I wouldn't bang this heffer with CareBear's dick.

Steve Phillips admitted to the affair earlier this week, and is currently trying to protect his family from this “delusional and obsessive” individual.  He is also on a “leave of absence” from ESPN while he deals with this issue, although it is widely believed he is suspended and eventually will be fired for his transgressions, following in the steps of another former Baseball Tonight analyst, Harold Reynolds.  Sadly, this isn’t the first affair Phillips has been engaged in.  In 1998, he was forced to admit to several affairs after being accused of sexual harassment while with the Mets.  He settled that case out of court.  It has also been reported that his wife has filed for divorce, immediately after this story broke.

Hundley is a graduate from Ithaca College with a degree in TV/Radio.  She’s certainly got the face for radio.  In her letter, she reported in graphic detail some of the things her and Phillips engaged in.  Some of the gems:

  • She’s “not just some random girl he had sex with in parking lots.
  • They “first slept together in St. Louis in his hotel suite.
  • They apparently went without a condom, because Steve “assured me I wouldn’t have to worry about getting pregnant since his vasectomy.”
  • They exchanged texts “mostly about the sexual side of our relationship.”  She even has “some saved if you ever want to read them.”
  • “He’s glad you decided to stay at home, he enjoys being with me because I have more of a passion and drive to really do something with my life.”
  • And she’s “not telling you all of this to hurt you in any way”
  • “To top it off, Steve has a big birthmark on his crotch right above his penis and one on his left inner thigh, so you know i’m not being fake”
I'd rather bang the storm trooper.

I'd rather bang the storm trooper.

Miss Hundley, is a real class act.  I’m glad that she wasn’t trying to hurt Mrs Phillips by writing this; imagine what her letter would look like if she WAS trying to hurt her?  I mean, she’s got a drive to do something with her life, what does Marni Phillips bring to the table?  For a communication’s major, who told students at her alma mater that writing is one of the most important skills a professional needs, the letter looks like it could’ve been written by a pubescent teenager.

What did we learn here, other than Phillips is a serial cheater and has ruined his family’s lives in the most public way possible?  First of all, if you’re going to cheat, cheat up.  Never, ever cheat down.  It’s that simple.  Listen, Phillips isn’t a particularly talented baseball man (See here) but he’s not dirtiest old man either.  He could definitely do better than this pig.  Hot chicks don’t become obsessed with their paramour, they simply move on because they can.  Ugly girls though, they are never going to see anything this good again in their miserable lives.  They are going to hold on for dear life, it’s science.  Second, ESPN doesn’t care about illicit affairs, but they do care about them when they come to public light.  It’s widely known that Chris Berman and Mark Schlereth are among the worst offenders in Bristol.  But nobody cares because their families aren’t sent nasty letters or pressing charges.  When Harold Reynolds was sued, he was never seen on the network again.  Phillips is next.

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2 Responses to Steve Phillips’ Public Walk of Shame

  1. puttz says:

    I wonder if carebear resembles that caption. Though he does squint a lot.

  2. Dan says:

    So many crazy things about this story.

    First off, you know it’s bad when ESPN had a headline stating that Steve Phillips has been fired. When Harold Reynolds got fired, I had no idea until I heard from an unrelated site. When Sean Salisbury got fired they were nice enough to word his departure as “looking into other career opportunities”… Shows what ESPN thinks of this…

    If this chick was even just a slight bit attractive we wouldn’t even be hearing of this story… but she looks like a dead cow.

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